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The Tomahawk Leader is a state and national prize-winning weekly newspaper serving the scenic Northwoods area in and around Tomahawk, WI.

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 Post subject: WISCONSIN
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 4:17 pm 
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Everyone has probably seen this before, but it is still humorous:

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin . :)

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too pricey," you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin . :)

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin . :)

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Head Cheese, you might live in Wisconsin . :D

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If you have either a pet or a child named "Brett," you might live in Wisconsin . :)

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin . :)

If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Minocqua, Waukesha , Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in Wisconsin. :)

If every time you see moonlight on a lake, you think of a dancing bear, and you sing gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters,"....you might live in Wisconsin . :wink:

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway. :wink:

2. "Vacation" means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend. :D

3. You measure distance in hours. :wink:

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once. :)

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again. :wink:

6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday. :)

7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching. :wink:

8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals ). :)

9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked. :wink:

10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison. :D

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them. :wink:

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time. :)

13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit. :wink:

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow. :D

15. You refer to the Packers as "we." :wink:

16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction. :)

17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent. :wink:

18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac Du Flambeau. :D

19. You consider Minneapolis exotic. :wink:

20. You know how to polka. :lol:

21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce. :wink:

22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age. :D

23. Down South to you means Illinois . :wink:

24. A brat is something you eat. :D

25. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed. :)

26. You go out to fish fry every Friday :)

27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost. :)

28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car. :)

29. You find minus twenty degrees "a little chilly." :D
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